The Secret of Getting Older

OK, getting older is pretty crummy in a lot of ways.  You will get lumpy, saggy, achey, and you will be boggled by technology that toddlers use intuitively.

But the very best thing about getting older, the thing that makes up for all of the other stuff is this:  as you get older you realize that you don't really have to care what other people think of you.

I can remember feeling so painfully aware of almost every social interaction.  How I dressed, how I looked, what I said or didn't say were all so very important that I might ruminate over the most minute details while I lay in bed each night.  And it didn't just seem important what other kids thought of me, it really was important.  Reputation and Social Hierarchy ruled almost every interaction.  We are certainly primates through and through.

But getting older lets you bypass all this, and here is how:  It is not because as you age you have more power or less power (both are true).  It is because as you get older you begin to realize you will die someday.  Maybe not someday soon, but certainly sooner than it used to be.  

And while this is scary and a little sad, it is also tremendously freeing.  

Because once you realize that your time on this earth is limited, you begin to appreciate how valuable it really is.  Each day, even the rainy ones, are small treasures that will just pass and you begin to want to slow them all down and notice every detail you can.  The way the light reflected on her hair, the sound of dry leaves crunching under your shoes, the delightful tickle of light fingertips brushing softly against your skin.

And more than this, you begin to stop worrying so much about beating other people, getting what they've got, or even more and more and more.  Instead you start to notice lots of small things about people (almost everyone) that make you smile, or breaks your heart just a little.  You see that others' happiness and sorrow are really just like yours, and it makes it so much easier to love them - all of them - at least some of the time.  They are dying too, just like you are, and they way they all keep going will seem almost brave to you.  

I know you don't exactly believe me, but try to imagine it if you can...